But since he's been gone, I've realized many practical reasons why I need a husband. Here they are.
1. He will mow.-he looks cute sweaty and grassy, and my yard doesn't look like a 2 year old took scissors to it.
2. He will weed-eat our yard.-I broke the nylon string ten times while trying to edge, and disassembled to head each time to retrieve more string. Apparently there's a faster, simpler way to make that happen. Yikes.
3. He will lift things.-I don't like hauling mulch, potting soil, dog carriers, luggage, limbs, laundry, groceries, furniture, or baby carriers. I'm scrawny and awkward and he is not. I will lift weights only, at the gym, when I'm on a fitness kick, post marriage. That's it.
4. He can reach things. -I cannot reach the mulch or the potting soil on the shelf. It is embarrassing to climb into a shelf to reach a flower pot, or need a dress down at the mall. I would like to use my upper level cabinets, clean the top of my refrigerator, prune trees, and paint crown molding. My future hubs has giraffe like limbs-ptL.
5. He knows that there is an oil container on the lawn mower. -(this statement implies that someone clearly did not...dying lawnmower...)
6. He has non brittle hands. -I don't like getting cuts and scrapes from messing in the yard, or moving things. I don't like getting dirt under my fingernails. I don't like touching car parts or dirty jars. I cannot open jars.
7. He is practical. -I am not. That's an easy one.
8. He can fix things. -I can't figure out the TV, cable, the computer, printer, mower, my car, my phone-anything operational really.
9. He will eat alot. -I want to cook a big casserole and not save it for ten days until I'm sick of it or it grows mold. One or the other currently always happens.
10. He is smart. -I will learn about history and science and the Bible and lawnmowers every night at the supper table. He's likely not interested in my knowledge on coordinating cushion patterns. That's ok with me.
11. He has short hair. -I will have unlimited bathroom-get-ready time because he'll be in and out in five.
12. He's always on time. -I never am. Hopefully he'll remedy this.
13. He will kill bugs. -on every woman's list
14. He will always grab the tab. -He always has, but he's gone in Italy and food is expensive I'm realizing!
15. He will protect me from all scary things. -Loud noises at night, creepy neighbors, standoff's in my neighborhood (that happened)...I will have a permanent security guard.
16. He will drive me around. -This is good for myself and all fellow drivers on the road. And I can sleep on road trips.
17. He will grill. -I don't know how, and could really go for a burger.
18. He will wash my car. -I hope, its rough.
19. He can use power tools. -I would saw off a finger and a toe and still not accomplish my project. I'd like several things made at this point.
20. And finally! He can take me with him when he goes to awesome countries to do awesome things for Jesus.
90 days til that hunk gets to be my hubby!
Mmmmm.
Mmmmm.
0 comments :
Post a Comment